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August 19 Traveler's Guide to Kiwi LanguageWe are hoping that the official language of the USA is still English. The official language of the majority of people living in New Zealand is also listed as English, although Maori also seems to be an official unknown language. When we arrived in New Zealand, a cheeky teenage MK asked us to pronounce the name Ngaruawahia as we passed the road sign indicating the town's location. Street and city names such as Papatoetoe, Whatawhata, Tauranga, Whangarei, and more caused Lori's father to comment on his first visit, "Who said you didn't have to learn a new language in New Zealand?" Well, that is just the start of it. We had to change an extremely high percentage of our vocabulary. The most difficult obstacle was learning to say toilet instead of restroom. It was a necessary pursuit. Gas station attendants didn't have the slightest clue what a restroom might be, and they certainly didn't have a bathroom there. We had to learn how to publicly say toilet without a blush. We practiced for six years before taking our first full furlough. Our first weeks back in the US consisted of reverse culture shock, for our relatives. One Sunday morning, I (Lori) unabashedly asked a brother-in-law where to find the church toilet. That civilized brother-in-law was dumbfounded and responded, "Lori, isn't that kind of crude? Toilet?" I had to stop and think and could not honestly remember what Americans call that place. I had to humbly ask for help remembering the word restroom. There are enough vocabulary differences to publish an entire book. Many of the differences make absolute sense...an American cooler is a Kiwi chilly-bin. We walk on a footpath here, instead of a sidewalk. Some are completely unexplainable. We've compiled a list of some of the most common, or our favorites. They are listed on a new sidebar on the left side, or click here. If you plan to travel to New Zealand, you would benefit from studying this list. Enjoy! November 10 Southern Hemisphere Christmas PreparationsWe were tickled to see a 10 week Christmas preparation guide in the newspaper on 18 October. (Yes, we're slow to post here!) You Northern Hemisphere people may enjoy a laugh, too.
What made us chuckle even further is that we were actually in the middle of doing #1, #2 and #3. Have we truly become a Kiwi family? For what it is worth, we have not ticked off ANYTHING on the list. Hopeless... Yesterday Heidi asked if she can arrange the Nativity scene when we put up the Christmas decorations. We are pleased that her pre-Christmas thoughts are on a spiritual plane.
August 26 Reverse Culture Shock and Belonging NowhereWe have long contemplated the phenomenon of feeling like we belong nowhere. Pastor Bixby alluded to the same feeling during his visit with us. People often ask us where we are from. We stare at them quizzically. We want to say, "What do you mean, where am I from? Do you mean in what country I was born? Do you mean in which state did I grow up? Do you mean where did I live last? Do you mean what town did I travel from to get here?" We usually try to second guess their meaning based on the context of the question.
We don't feel like Americans anymore. We love The Star-Spangled Banner. But singing it in church seems a bit out of place. We've lived seven of the last nine years in New Zealand. We've tried to adopt the Kiwi (New Zealand) lifestyle, when we can actually identify what is the Kiwi lifestyle. (New Zealand, like the United States, was settled by immigrants and is made of many, many cultures). In spite of our efforts, we aren't Kiwis. We could almost pass for Kiwis except for our burgundy/navy/hunter green plaid couch and our American accents. Even our children, both born in New Zealand, sound like Americans.
We sensed this phenomenon keenly during our last stateside visit. And we faced it instantly. We struggled to order smoothies on arrival at the Los Angeles airport. Looking back, we didn't understand the way they are made, and we were confused by the flavour choices on the blackboard. The lady behind the counter wondered what planet we were from! Initially, some Americans thought our voices reflected a Kiwi accent. We suspect some who observed our behaviour wondered what was wrong with us and found us at times to be somewhat odd! As our visit lengthened into two years, we felt this sensation lessen. Strangely, when we stepped off the plane and were back on New Zealand soil, we immediately felt at home again, as if we had never left New Zealand, even though we yet had no place to call home.
Two articles published by Women of the Harvest have helped to consolidate and thoroughly express our thoughts on these issues. Consider the following excerpts from an article by Damaris Zehner,
"I can feel alone and abandoned here. But when I go back to the United States, I can feel alone there, too. The things I left behind are not the same...It seems that there is no place to call home, no place where I do not feel like a stranger. Experts label this feeling reverse culture shock, and to an extent it is. But it is also the result of growth and age--of the coming of wisdom with time."
Her article resonated deeply with us. The entire article, Pruning Back by Damaris Zehner, appeared in the July/August 2005 Women of the Harvest onlineMagazine.
We enjoyed, laughed with, and related well to the article Re-entry: Are You Ready for the Shock of Your life? by Paula Cowan which appeared in the May/June 2007 Women of the Harvest onlineMagazine.
We cling to a loving church family in both countries and have blood relatives in the country where we are not. Where is home? If we aren't Americans and we aren't Kiwis, what are we? Scriptural perspective answers this question, of course. We've listed in our profile that our hometown is Heaven. July 11 Would you believe we won a bedroom makeover?Unbelievable?! Yes, that is what we thought, too. But it really is true. Here is how it happened:
When we bought our house last August, a local publishing business sent us a copy of their building and renovating magazine. I (Lori) had a look through it and found nothing of particular value except an interesting quarter-page ad for a bedroom makeover. Entry requirements were only to send in a photo of the bedroom and a letter of less than 50 words of why you would like to have it. I thought, of course, that winning would be fantastic and cut out the ad. Said ad then sat on the office desk for at least three months. Eventually, in order to pacify myself, I photographed our bedroom and managed to get the photos printed. After more weeks went by, I sat down and typed up a letter, knowing full well a winner had probably already been chosen. Alas! It was well over 50 words. Putting my best high-school English editing skills to the test, I narrowed it down to less than 50 words and sealed everything in an envelope. I then put the advertisement in the rubbish bin and thought, "There, that's done. At least I tried." Something like six weeks later I received a phone call that went something like this:
Me: Hello?
Lady: Is this Mrs. Silsbee?
Me: Yes?
Lady: My name is _______, and I'm calling from Waikato Business Publications.
Me: What? No Way! NO WAY!
Lady: Yes, I'm calling to tell you...
Me: Interrupting her...NO WAY!
Lady: that you have won the bedroom makeover.
Me: NO WAY!
Lady: (Probably thinking...Maybe she doesn't want it?) I'm glad to hear that you are so delighted.
Me: I can't believe it.
Lady: Where are you from?
Me: Originally the States.
Lady: How long have you lived in New Zealand?
Me: We first arrived in 1998.
Lady: Well, you are Kiwi then.
And I don't really remember what else exactly was said. I was hyperventilating. Basically, she said the interior designer would be in touch with us after the Christmas holidays. And indeed, she did contact us in February when school started. The makeover supplied paint, curtain fabric, a furniture voucher, bed linen, and the interior designer. The designer convinced a local light store to supply lamps as well. Thanks to Waikato Business Publications, Resene Paints, Textilia, Furniture by Mecchia, Linen Affair, Hamilton Lighthouse and Paula Hassard for their services and goods. Thanks to Scott's mom and dad who bought us the bed and headboard when we got married. They also spent a good portion of their vacation time here in March helping Scott do the painting in the bedroom (and a couple bathrooms, too!). Thanks to Elisa, my sister, who sent the gold pillow for a birthday present. It fits perfectly. I must confess I made the drapes in bits and pieces of time and in fear and trepidation in order to spare the expense of paying someone else to make them.
As you can imagine, we are delighted. We did not hang anything in the bedroom when we moved into this house. We just couldn't come up with a plan that we liked. We had a blessing coming and a solution we didn't dream of, initially!
Our home here is a double blessing to us. We are thankful to have it. But, after having our personal belongings in storage for two long years, we are doubly blessed to not only be in a nice house, but to be in our own home.
This is a good time to publicly thank Bill and Nancy Hunt of our church family in Rockford, IL. During our year in Rockford, they loaned us their personal dressers so that we could feel at home in our rented house full of things on loan from our church family. While we used their dressers, they used plastic bins. Thankfully, we didn't realize the dressers weren't spare dressers until we returned them a year later. We could have used the plastic bins! We will never forget this demonstration of love toward Christian brethren who were in need.
Are you wondering what I said in the letter? I wondered that, too. I found it in the dark recesses of the computer. Here it is:
To Whom It May Concern:
We once heard in a marriage seminar that the master bedroom should be the nicest room in the house. We set out to do it and collected some medieval accessories. We need a professional and funds to help us transform a blah room into the perfect romantic retreat. Please help! We've posted the makeover photos in the "Where We Are" photo album. Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow. July 4th in a boxThose of us in the Southern Hemisphere who hail from the Northern Hemisphere appreciate Christmas in July celebrations, which are commonly referred to as "Mid-Winter Christmas." Restaurants here even prepare meals for such an event.
So, how about "Mid-Winter July 4th"? We had just that, courtesy of Lori's sister Joy. We received a party box including USA flag tablecloth, napkins, and paper plates as well as red cutlery (silverware, for you Americans) and plastic cups. Most interesting and fun were the sparkler straws. Also included in the box were such American treats as Boston Baked Beans (you know, the red candy peanuts?), Pop Rocks (lolly crystals that fizz in your mouth, for you Kiwis), Orville Redenbachers (popcorn, for you Kiwis), and Bazooka (bubble gum, for you Kiwis). We had a hey day. The patriotic music CDs were pulled out of their dusty jackets and we had to wear red, white, and blue, too. None of our techno-geek friends were around, so we couldn't figure out how to use the timer feature on the camera for a group photo. Posted in the 2007 special days photo album are a few select self-portraits taken by various members of our family.
When the kids were in bed, mum and dad ended the day with a nice cup of hot chocolate. That is a nice Southern Hemisphere 4th of July event to make a tradition!
Thank you, Joy, for a lovely party. We have enough leftovers (minus the tablecloth and the Boston Baked Beans) to do it again next year. June 08 Thanksgiving Preparations BeginYou say, "What?" Well, you have to read our November 2006 blog entry, if you haven't already.
Scott has safely stored in the chest freezer a Thanksgiving turkey. We ate one this week in honour of last year's Thanksgiving. The other two were given to a friend. The fifth didn't appear to be fit to eat.
Turkeys (smaller than these) are $60 at the supermarket! May 04 Surprise FindOne night recently Scott and I started foaming at the mouth and thinking of all the American junk food products we can't get here...Swiss cake rolls, Hostess cupcakes, Little Debbie Star Crunch, Doritos, Brach's candies, E.L. Fudge (is that name right?) cookies, and on and on we went. We really didn't buy that stuff much during our two-year stint in the States. Of course, as mentioned earlier on this blog, we don't need it until we can't have it. When this foaming at the mouth occurred, we determined then and there that the next time we return to the States we are going to have [another] "Heart Attack Party."
After Scott's mom and dad left here in March (yes, this is a bit late coming!) an A & W root beer can showed up in our recycle bin. That was very significant because we can't buy it here, or so we thought. Further investigation revealed that some missionary friends of ours had dropped in to visit Scott's parents while Scott and I were taking advantage of the grandparents' presence and were out on a much needed date. These so-called friends had stopped to visit us without calling us first (not really a problem to us) and walked in sipping A & W root beer without bringing any for us (quite the problem) and then left a can in our recycle bin to rub it in (quite audacious and if they weren't really friends, very mean...hee, hee). Actually, they didn't realize I share the same...love isn't the word...fondness for this drink. We don't keep "fizzy" in the house and drink it rarely, but we have room in our diet for the odd ice cream float.
I wrote our "friends" and asked where they found this delicacy. Lo and behold, it was at a Thai shop not too far from our house. Scott bought me some within a few days. It's gone now. At least we know we can have root beer floats for July 4th, even if it is the middle of winter. Grandparents and WebcamsLong distance...I still think that is the hardest part of living overseas, so far from family. When someone needs help, we can't be there. When the kids miss the grandparents, we can't just pack up and go. When we need a babysitter, we have to pay one! But, we are learning to find ways around those issues.
When Heidi finished kindergarten last year, we had an online K-5 graduation. Grandaddy and Grandmommy and Aunt Joy met us via our webcams. Heidi asked for banana cake. Lori made banana cake. Grandmommy made banana cake. Heidi read to everyone, quotes a few things and answered questions that someone finishing K-5 should know. The jury agreed to award Heidi a K-5 graduation certificate. And then we all ate banana cake. Heidi has asked about first grade graduation.
Each week, unless I forget(!) or there is an unusual schedule conflict, Heidi and Daniel sit down for a bedtime story with Grandaddy. Well, it is his bedtime, anyway. Due to the time difference, for him to read to the kids at their bedtime, he would have to rise VERY early. The webcams work well most of the time. Sometimes Heidi comes running to tell me something has gone wrong. We might have to get Grandaddy's attention (he's reading you know) and communicate that the sound has gone out, or other such possible problems. But, the kids look forward to it. It think the grandparents look forward to it.
Except for touching and frequency of contact, we pretend like they really aren't so far away. March 12 Treasured TimesFor us, the most difficult part of living in New Zealand is the distance between us and our families. The development of cheap long distance calling, video cameras, email, and now webcams has helped us keep our sanity and survive holidays and birthdays. But, now and then, we need to be together...in person. Before leaving the US again last year, we spent a significant amount of money visiting both sets of parents and all of our siblings. It was hard on the budget, but well-worth the investment. And we aren't a bit sorry we did it. They are treasured memories. Memories....
So, despite the effect on the budget, and in order to make more memories to help us last another year, Scott's mom and dad arrived on March 1st to spend three weeks with us. We are elated. We didn't really care that we had to get up at some ridiculous hour of the morning to go pick them up at the airport an hour and a half away. We stopped at Dunkin' Donuts (which can only be found in Auckland) and splurged financially and calorically on a dozen donuts. We ate the whole dozen before we got home. We are having fun. We can hardly hear ourselves speak at times...we all want to talk at once. We invited everyone from church to come spend an evening with them. They are taking in all aspects of our ministry here. We have more planned than we can fit into the schedule.
And then they will leave. We will all be sad. But we will all be happy. January 10 Don't need it 'til we can't have itWhy must we only desire something when we can't have it? For many years we have lived without sweet potatoes. We were told New Zealand doesn't have them. While living temporarily in the States, we didn't think to buy sweet potatoes. When Thanksgiving came this year (see previous blog entry if you haven't already), we missed them terribly. What is Thanksgiving dinner without sweet potato casserole?
Here in New Zealand we do enjoy kumara. It is a very strange looking bumpy, hard, potato type veggie. The flesh is white, like a potato, but it tastes sweeter. Typically, we eat it diced, lathered in olive oil and rosemary, and then baked in a mix of regular potato, kumura, and pumpkin. It really is quite yummy. But, it isn't sweet potato casserole.
Recently, we landed a different type of kumara (kaipara) in our grocery bag. Instead of purple skin, the kumara had orange-y skin. When peeled, the kumara looked orange. Hmmm...potato type veggie, sweet in flavor, orange in colour....tomorrow we are having kaipara kumara casserole for dinner!!!! It has probably been in the grocery store all along...we just didn't know what it was.
It has been so long since we bought sweet potato, we don't even remember what they look like. Here's a photo of kaipara kumara. Is it the same? We think so. December 18 Only In America!I (Lori) was enjoying a few hours of solitude...very rare indeed...and spent that time running errands...so very typical. After a period of silence, I sought something for listening enjoyment and found only Patch the Pirate was available. Since I receive a very steady and plentiful diet of Patch and his crew, I chose to turn on the van radio, which I normally avoid. (Scott leaves it set on the talk back radio station for catching odd bits of New Zealand news). The current program was a book review discussion, so I decided to half-listen as I drove. However, I was quickly amused. One of the hosts declared she had an item to recommend for purchase. She said it was really only a quasi-book, but was worth a mention due to the novelty of the item. Said item was then announced as a 90-minute DVD of a yule log fire burning. Also included is a Christmas carol book. The reviewer maintained you can listen to the fire burning! And you can sing carols by the fire! I laughed out loud. You see, it is summer here. There are no fires burning inside. I thought, only in New Zealand would such an idea be entertained! Then I thought, no, wait! Only in the southern hemisphere would such an idea be conceived. After all, Australians would have this same problem, and perhaps South Africans.
I resolved then and there to add this bit of humour to our blog. Why did we never think of such an easy way to make our down under Christmas seem more like a "real" Christmas? After all, it is very amusing to shop in the heat and hear such songs as "Walking in a Winter Wonderland." Why does the Northern Hemisphere rule Christmas?
Anyway, wanting to truly impress you with my blog writing skills, I decided to look up this valued item and list a link for you to verify my assertion. Well, what should my wondering eyes discover...but this ridiculous DVD was not made for Kiwis, or for the Southern Hemisphere, but for AMERICANS! Then, I really LAUGHED OUT LOUD! OF COURSE! Only in America would such a frivoulous, ridiculous item be "invented." I have come to enjoy our warm, humid, snowless Christmas season. It isn't necessary to put out Christmas lights since everyone is in bed when it gets dark.
But, perhaps you are still very American. Maybe your house doesn't have a fireplace. Maybe you can't be bothered lighting a fire. Perhaps you would like to order one of these very special DVDs that will make you "feel like it is Christmas." Tonight, Amazon declares they only have 4 left! If they are out, I see Barnes and Noble might still have a few on hand. Enjoy! Purchase your own copy here. November 24 Thanksgiving Down UnderThanksgiving celebrations this year have been a journey. For a start, we feel very thankful every day. We are thankful to be entrusted with the ministry leadership at Good News Baptist Church. We are thankful to be in our own home with our own possessions. We are thankful our family is intact with loving relationships. And we are thankful to be part of God's family. But, the American in us will never completely go away, and so we desired to honor Thanksgiving to help our children connect with and understand their heritage. And so, the journey began...
December 2005 Heidi Put Thanksgiving turkey sticker on calendar box for Thursday,
November 23, 2006
September 2006 Heidi Ask mummy if we will have pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving
early October 2006 Lori Search grocery stores in hope of finding canned pumpkin this year
but still find only pumpkin soup
October 13, 2006 Scott Tell inquiring Kiwi that, yes, we do celebrate Thanksgiving
October 31, 2006 Lori Purchase two small pumpkin halves in fear of not finding them
Thanksgiving week (not pumpkin season), make note that there are
no turkeys yet, either (nevermind, can't afford one anyway, they cost
a fortune)
November 7, or so Lori Cook pumpkin before it rots in fridge, freeze for later use
November 11 Scott Ask Lori if she can buy cranberries for Thanksgiving
November 12 Lori Look for stuffing recipe and add celery to grocery list
November 13 Lori Search grocery store for in hope of finding fresh cranberries this year
but still find only canned whole berries, purchase everything they have
(two cans), look at stuffing mixes and instead decide to buy celery
November 15 Lori Call Canadian friend who lived in the States for a while and invite her
and Kiwi husband over for pumpkin pie after Thanksgiving
November 17 Lori Get pumpkin out of freezer and put in fridge to thaw
November 18 Lori Find a new stuffing recipe that doesn't call for fresh cranberries, relieved
to already have the needed celery
November 19 Lori Look at several Thanksgiving menus and dream of including fresh rolls
at our Thanksgiving meal
Family Devour pumpkin pie given to us by co-workers at church who had family
here from the States and celebrated an early Thanksgiving
November 20 Lori Lay out bread slices on cookie sheet to get stale for stuffing recipe
November 21 Lori Move cookie sheet with bread slices to top of fridge, serve peanut butter
on celery for dinner
November 22 Lori Spend the day with children at homeschool support group for "Olympics"
competition, nobody asks about our Thanksgiving plans
November 23 THANKSGIVING!!
 Heidi Ask mummy if we are having anyone over for Thanksgiving
Scott Find out from a Kiwi at 3:15 p.m. that today is Thanksgiving
Lori Spend morning visiting with a neighbor, spend afternoon doing
homeschool work with Heidi (missed two days already this week due to
reasons I can't remember), get chicken patties and french fries out of
freezer, cook and serve for dinner with peanut butter on celery, comfort
teary-eyed Heidi that we WILL have Thanksgiving dinner, just not today),
put stale bread for stuffing in a ziploc bag
November 24 DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING
 Lori Make two pumpkin pies, contemplate cutting up bread cubes for stuffing,
do homeschool with Heidi instead
Daniel Ask mummy, "What is pumpkin pie?"
Daniel Ask mummy, "Can I have some pumpkin pie?"
November 25 TWO DAYS AFTER THANKSGIVING
 Lori Make stuffing with leftover celery
Family Enjoy Thanksgiving dinner...roast chicken, rice, stuffing, gravy, canned
cranberries, and pumpkin pie
Lori Hide second pumpkin pie until friends come over tomorrow evening,
make mental note not to make up homeschool studies on Thanksgiving
day next year November 16 DIY for age 2 and upLast weekend we had a much needed family night. Our creative juices were flowing and we tackled a project that had been on the to do list for years...yes, years and years!
A long, long time ago, before there were any children and we had time to go places, and time to dilly dally when we went those places, we stopped at Lake Taupo and collected a large pile of pumice stones. (For those who don't know, New Zealand is home to many former volcanos, and a live one that erupted in the 1990s. Lake Taupo's edge is laced with pumice stones, porous and lightweight, created by volcanic foam during eruption.) Our pile of pumice stones has moved house with us several times, always wishing to be admired instead of left to collect dust or rainwater in a dark corner.
The pumice stones' special day finally arrived. Lori sorted them by size. Heidi and Daniel acted as gophers, carefully transporting the stones in order between mummy and daddy. Scott drilled a large hole in each one, and then H & D ceremoniously put each stone onto a very long metal rod which we had purchased for the occasion. The rod was then raised in monumental fashion and pounded into the garden.
In true family activity style, something had to go wrong. The pounding of the hammer shattered a few of the pumice stones. A handyman's glue for porous surfaces, pulled from the dark recesses of the garage pantry, worked like magic and no one will ever know! (Well, now you do!)
We all enjoyed this very simple, but lasting family event. You can see Heidi and Daniel proudly standing by our new garden ornament. Lest you be overly impressed, this idea is not a Silsbee original. We've copied someone else who copied someone else. But, we made it ourselves and H & D are very proud! November 01 52 States?Several weeks ago one of the men (we will call him Jay) who works with Scott started harassing Scott about the number of states comprising the United States of America. Jay began his multi-week one-sided debate by asking Scott, "Did you know there are 52 states?" Scott said, "No." Jay said he had never met an American who knew there were 52 states. He just couldn't believe the ignorance of Americans regarding their own country. Scott couldn't convince him otherwise and decided not to bother. Jay continued to bring it up over several weeks. When pressed to discuss it, Scott continued to answer there are only 50 states. He also offered to provide a list of the 50 states so that Jay could tell him which two were missing. Jay finally decided to call the embassy and ask there. He did call the embassy on his lunch break and returned totally dumbfounded to admit he was wrong and that there were only 50! Jay then spent the rest of the day asking everyone else if they knew there are only 50 states! |
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